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  so as long as youre actually monogamous, and hiv negative, you can have all the unprotected sex you want without worrying about hiv. Were together for 18 years now, always been monogamous, have less sex then in the beginning of our relationship, which now means twice a week, most of it oral or mutual masturbation, up to twice a month anal. Although since i rediscovered the joy of bottoming a few weeks ago, we might be up for a higher count in anal sex soon. Gay male relationships where there is a parenting factor involved differ from straight relationships mostly in that same-sex parenting needs extra support. Locally in la, the pop luck club is an information and socialsupport group for actual or potential gay fathers. Pain after anal sex i am a gay man in a long term, monogamous relationship. I have never received anal sex before my current boyfriend, and have been extremely safe (cond.). Other relationship factors that have been identified as possible contributors to increased hiv risk among gay male couples include partners sexual history 3436, familiarity with the partner in general 31, 34, perceived monogamy , relationship status or partner types 2426, 29, 30, 3740, unknown or assumed partners hiv status 28, 38, 41, and faulted sexual agreements 28. In the 1970s and early 1980s, studies investigating gay men in relationships reported high rates of non-monogamy (bell & weinberg, 1978 blumstein & schwartz, 1983). In fact, some reported that, after the first year, few gay couples remained monogamous (mattison & mcwhirter, 1987). The majority of gay couples who had sex with outside partners had an understanding whereby sex. However, gay men and men who have sex with men have some specific health concerns. Although your individual risks are shaped by many factors beyond your sexual orientation and practices including family history and age its important to understand common health issues for gay men and steps you can take to stay healthy.   as all gay guys know, in the gay community barebacking is a very taboo subject, and rightly so because of the enormous risk of hiv infection that gay men face. The question for me is is barebacking ok in a monogamous relationship after both people have been tested for hiv (and other stds? I doubt that many married heterosexual couples trying anal sex use a condom for it.). Many guys who are in monogamous relationships (having sex with only one guy) think they are at low risk of picking up or passing on hiv. This is true, but only if you know your status and that of your partner and neither of you is having sex with other people.

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